


Punishment

by SedinetteMichaelis



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: And we hate Sandalphon, Archangels are all jerks, But in a bad way, Crowley loves Aziraphale, Gabriel is a jerk, M/M, Marking, Please Forgive me, Possessive Crowley, Torture, hell fire, kind of, poor Aziraphale
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-29
Updated: 2019-11-29
Packaged: 2021-02-26 01:40:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,482
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21605437
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SedinetteMichaelis/pseuds/SedinetteMichaelis
Summary: Higher authorities didn’t wish for more Fallen to emerge. It would have only created more warriors for the opposition. It was quite sensible, if one really thought about it. Eliminating the stubborn angels wasn’t a good idea either because it would have reduced the warriors in their ranks. It wasn’t ideal, as Heaven was preparing to go to war.Archangels, with the authorities, had developed a new system to channel all the energy.A punishment system.
Relationships: Aziraphale & Crowley (Good Omens), Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Comments: 5
Kudos: 92





	Punishment

**Author's Note:**

  * A translation of [Punishment](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20780777) by [SedinetteMichaelis](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SedinetteMichaelis/pseuds/SedinetteMichaelis). 
  * A translation of [Punishment](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20780777) by [SedinetteMichaelis](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SedinetteMichaelis/pseuds/SedinetteMichaelis). 



> Hi people ! 
> 
> I am so happy to present you my first english fanfiction ever ! It's actually my french fanfiction that I translated. So it took me a lot of time to present you this fanfiction, and it took a lot of time from my betas to read me. So thanks to Dom and Loreleï for their help and their time. Without these wonderful ladies, I woudn't have publish it :) 
> 
> I hope you will appreciate it all :)

Aziraphale didn’t have many memories from the time before the Rebellion. He had been created only a short time before and had only been a young Principality. He didn’t have the time to know Lucifer and the other Fallens. It had probably been for the best. Aziraphale was curious by nature and, inevitably, he would have meddled with them, which would have led him into trouble as well.

Aziraphale liked being an angel. He loved the other creatures evolving around him, and he had way too much compassion for other beings. He would have been a very poor demon.

Regrettably for him, it was this same weakness that also made him a very insubordinate angel.

Aziraphale remembered peaceful days, passed in the Garden of Eden, then under construction. Under the strict guidance of the Archangels, they imagined and brought to life many animal species, one after another, followed by flora. Except for Raphael of course, who spent most of his time creating stars in the sky.

Next came the Fall…when it all changed. Angels started regarding one another with suspicion, fearing that any of their brethren could be plotting against Heaven. It was nothing more than collective paranoia, but some took advantage of the opportunity to create problems and disrespect each other. Many angels were highly displeased by this behaviour. The authorities expected professionalism from their angels, in contrast with the burning passion that animated the Fallen angels during the Rebellion.

However, higher authorities didn’t wish for more Fallen to emerge. It would have only created more warriors for the opposition. It was quite sensible, if one really thought about it. Eliminating the stubborn angels wasn’t a good idea either because it would have reduced the warriors in their ranks. It wasn’t ideal, as Heaven was preparing to go to war.

Archangels, with the authorities, had developed a new system to channel all the energy.

A punishment system.

They had all cringed at that. Many angels were still young – a few hundred years at the oldest, and they had much more difficulties submitting to stricter rules.

Aziraphale was one of the first angels to experience this punishment.

Too often late for his missions, too often questioning, too often giving excuses to his superiors to justify himself. It was something that had once been accepted. However, things had changed.

There were five angels condemned to the Punishment, for more or less the same offenses.

Aziraphale had understood right away that they would serve as an example for the other angels. There was a new system in place and authorities had to show that they would not hesitate to use it to get them into line. There would be no leniency.

What he didn’t know was that they wouldn’t hesitate to use it as often as they needed.

They had been held up, tied to a pole, their chests and backs bared to the crowd of angels, for all to see what awaited them if they didn’t do exactly what was expected of them.

Sandalphon had approached them with a red-hot iron, the tip crimson and steaming. He had been hesitant with the first angel, but he had marked him with a sigil created for this special occasion, the sigil of shame. Aziraphale couldn't remember the name of the first angel punished, but he did remember his scream, the sound of the flesh burning and the horrible smell that immediately followed. All angels present, Archangels included, had shivered at this first excruciating scream of pain.

It had not only been a red-hot iron, but it had also been a hellish red-hot iron, burning with Hellfire.

How did they obtain it ? He had no clue at the time. After the Apocalypse, it had been clear for Aziraphale that the authorities had asked for help from one or two demons who had probably hastily accepted. How could they resist the opportunity to cause pain to some angels ?

The angel marked at their side was sobbing and Aziraphale swallowed with difficulty. Already, Sandalphon was readying the next in line for the marking.

After a moment, he had felt Sandalphon stand behind him. While celestial and demonic beings didn’t need to breathe – they just did it by habit –, Aziraphale had felt his breath shorten, and his eyes moistened with tears. He didn’t deserve that. They hadn't done anything wrong, he had thought to himself miserably, while a tear had slipped down his cheek.

Sandalphon had pressed the red-hot iron to his flesh, burning his soul to its core, and Aziraphale had screamed in agony.

OoO

It had been the first time he had been marked, but it definitely hadn't been the last. Oh, he had been marked a lot of time after that. The second time, it had been for the whole thing about the Garden of Eden, when Adam and Even had given into temptation under his supervision. Then, soon after that, a third time, when the authorities had realized that he had lost his flaming sword.

The fourth time had been when they had learnt that his _celestial_ sword had been collected by _Hell_ to be given, in a distant future, to one of the Four Horsemen : War. It had been his fault after all, and Archangels hadn't really cared that he had been being punished twice for the same crime.

The following times had mostly been linked to his insubordination and the excessive amount of frivolous miracles he did, whether it was to help humans or, in the Archangels’ words, just for his own gluttony. Some other times, it was because he had been caught tempting humans for Crowley. Or because of events linked to Crowley.

Edimbourg. Caught tempting a human.

Paris. A miracle too many that had led a human to his death, although he was not supposed to die.

London. The destruction of a Church during the Blitz which shouldn’t have happened. The non-authorized creation of holy water. The opening of the bookshop two centuries ago.

He had never talked to Crowley about it. Aziraphale didn’t know how the demon would have reacted and he considered it too dangerous. The angel was mostly afraid of what he would think if he learned about it. Disdain ? Pity ? Maybe he would have laughed ? Oh no, he preferred not to think about it. Yes, he was a coward, so what ? He would certainly not tell him.

And he would probably have earned another mark. Aziraphale didn’t disobey on purpose, and he would like to avoid getting marked again.

Unfortunately, he still got marked. Gradually, it was all his back that had been marked, then his arms and his torso.

Despite having been regularly marked, he never got used to the pain. Each time, he needed months to completely recover. He became less afraid as time passed by, and he even eased the other angels punished along with himself, especially the one punished for the first time. It wasn't that terrible after all, a bad moment to get through, then they could move on. Him? Oh… Even if he was marked, again and again, he didn’t seem to learn his lesson, he kept disobeying and doing too many unwanted miracles.

After a few centuries, Aziraphale began to hide his body under several layers of clothes, so no one could see the marks recovering his skin. So he didn’t have to see them. He liked the human sense of fashion, but after the seventies, people had been wearing less and less clothes, so he ceased to change his wardrobe. Coat, jacket, long-sleeved shirts, and bow ties to keep it tight.

Aziraphale was ashamed to have been marked so much. He was a bad angel and the proof was there, spread out on his skin. He didn’t want anyone to see what he really was. A failure.

“Aziraphale”, Gabriel had said some time before the Antichrist was delivered to Crowley. “You are a good element, you do good work and you give useful information… But you are so dissipated. You don’t have place for any other mark. I will be forced to act more… Radically, if I can say, if you had to deceive us again in some way, while the War is coming.”

Gabriel and the others didn’t act when he admitted to having lost the Antichrist. It wasn’t useful for them. The beginning of the end of the world was there, at most two days from there, and they had better to do than punishing him for the umpteenth time. Maybe they thought they would get rid of him during the War between Heaven and Hell ?

It didn’t matter anymore.

Armageddon was here.

OoO

_An hour after the Armageddon That Wasn’t_

The first thing Aziraphale did when he was finally alone was to remove his coat and jacket, then open his shirt.

What a deception to find that the marks were still here, recovering his torso and arms. After all, it wasn’t stupid to think that by losing the body Heaven gave to him, the marks would be gone as well. Aziraphale had hoped that the new body given by Adam would be blank.

‘As if it were that simple…’ he internally sighed.

The mark given to disobeying angels like Aziraphale didn’t just impact the body. They afflicted the soul too.

“What’s going on, angel?” Crowley suddenly asked.

They were settled in the bus that was supposed to bring them back to London, and Aziraphale had been watching through the window since the bus had left Tadfield.

“What are you talking about, my dear ?

“You’re too quiet, it doesn’t sound like you. You always have something to say.”

“I…” Aziraphale swallowed with difficulty under the gaze of his friend. “I suppose I’m just anxious. I doubt Heaven and Hell are going to leave us in peace now that we spoiled their war. What do you think ?”

Crowley didn’t seem convinced, he was sure something else was worrying him, but he answered nonetheless.

“You are right. What did the last prophecy of Agnes Nutter say ?”

“It says to choose our face wisely. What will they do to us if they caught us ?”

“Oh, for you, angel, it will be hellfire. For me, probably holy water.”

Aziraphale shuddered at this prospect. He already had a taste of it and he didn’t expect anything else for him in the near future.

“Unless…”

The angel turned his head towards Crowley who seemed to be in a great reflection.

“What are you thinking about, Crowley ?

“And if… And what if you swap our faces ?”

“I am afraid I don't understand what you mean…”

“We swap our bodies. I take your appearance and you take mine.”

Aziraphale paled in an instant while thinking at all the implications before he calmed down. His biggest fear was for Crowley to find out about the marks, but the demon would only take his appearance and not the marks linked to his soul. The swap would only create an illusion, a perfect illusion, so his borrowing body would not bear any mark.

“It can work.”

“Nobody is looking angel,” he said while reaching out for his hand.

OoO

It did not fail. The following day of their return, they had been caught. Crowley could only congratulate himself for his interpretation of the last prophecy of Agnes Nutter, while he was tied to a chair. He tested the ropes and watched around. It had been a long time since he last saw the Silver City, and he had to say that it had changed a lot, even if it was always so immaculate. Boring. 

How did his angel do to like this place ?

 _He probably doesn’t_ , his mind whispered. _That's why_ _he spends so much time on Earth with you_.

This thought particularly pleased him. Crowley was a greedy being. Avid of possession, of novelty, of sex, of everything. And he was possessive with all the things he considered as his. His plants, his Bentley… and Aziraphale. The angel was his as surely as the rest, but he had a special place. Crowley could live without his material possession, he could deal with it. But without Aziraphale ? He couldn’t be replaced and he couldn’t live without him. The angel was essential.

He thought he would have died of pain when he had believed Aziraphale gone forever. His bookshop on fire, without life in it. An aching and harsh emptiness had filled his chest. The worst possible pain had taken possession of his entire being. Crowley could only remember the last words he had said to Aziraphale while thinking it had been the last time he’d seen him.

_“I won’t even think about you !”_

If Aziraphale hadn’t shown under his discorporated form, Crowley could have done a really big mistake.

Crowley loved Aziraphale. A twisted love, somewhat unhealthy, but he loved him in his own way.

“Ah, Aziraphale, So glad you could join us,” Gabriel said with his annoying hypocrite smile that was giving the demon murderous ideas.

“You could have just sent a message. I mean, a kidnapping in broad daylight…”

“Call it what it was : An extraordinary rendition.”

Gabriel turned towards the other angels.

“Now, have we heard from our new associate ?”

“New associate?” Crowley frowned. It was what he thought about. Hell and Heaven were fraternizing to punish them.

“You’re gonna like this, Aziraphale. You probably didn’t see that coming. Well… You probably knew about it. After all these deceptions. It is your last. I told you. There is no place left on your body for another mark.”

So. With one act of treason, you stop the war. A last act of insubordination.”

Last act of insubordination? What was he talking about? No. No question. Crowley had to be impassive.

“Well, I think the Greater Good…”

“Don’t talk to me about the Greater Good, Sunshine. I am the Archangel fucking Gabriel. The Greater Good was we were finally going to settle things with the opposition once for all.”

Crowley didn’t have a single idea about what he was talking about. None, nada ! However, he understood that Aziraphale had hidden things from him. And not just trifles. Important pieces of information on what the angels did in Heaven. He didn’t know what had happened, but he knew deep down that the Archangels had hurt his angel. And they were going to pay for it.

And why the hell did Gabriel call the angel, _his angel_ , ‘sunshine’ ?! Only Crowley had the right to give pet names to Aziraphale. And he didn’t forget that bloody Sandalphon. He was going to kill him, to tear him apart. Did he authorize a demon to hit him ? To hit Aziraphale ? Oh, this wasn’t going to happen.

When he walked towards the fire, he let himself be overwhelmed by his power. Nothing was better for an occult being like himself who was low on energy. All this Satan situation had worn him out. Now ? He could have created a very unfortunate wild hellfire within the Silver City. Maybe even burn these fuckers. He didn’t eat very often, rarely for a matter of facts, but he liked grilled chicken.

He finally didn’t burn them like nuggets. Aziraphale probably wouldn’t have found that very funny. And he had to keep his cover for now. Spitting fire was enough to frighten them. That, and surviving hellfire, of course.

Crowley took a step out of the fire while smoothing his coat and took his more benevolent smile in a successful attempt to imitate his friend.

“I think, and you probably agree with me, my dear friends, that we shouldn’t go further.”

“Aziraphale…” Gabriel said.

“No, I’m not finished. No more orders. No more… No more markings. You let me in peace and I would not cause any more annoyance.”

The Archangels nodded and Crowley smiled compassionately, just as Aziraphale would. Then he turned around to step into the elevator leading to Earth, determined. He had things to say to a certain angel.

He came out of the elevator at the same moment Aziraphale came out of the one mounting from Hell. His skin seemed slightly wet and he was smoothing his clothes. Crowley looked at him in an interrogative way.

“Oh… They made me have a bath. Holy Water,” he explained with a smile that, really, didn’t do well on his demonic face. “And… And you ?”

“They tried to burn me alive,” Crowley answered with a shrug.

“Ah.”

He saw his face fall. Aziraphale might have had difficulties in believing that the Archangels would do that to him. His angel was too naive about their true nature. Humans, angels, or demons, it was the same thing, in the end. He wasn’t surprised by the fate Beelzebub had planned for him with the holy water. In reality, he wasn’t expecting anything else from them. Otherwise would have been deceiving. Aziraphale had probably provided a good show.

“Come on, let’s get some fresh air.”

Aziraphale nodded and followed the demon in disguise to the exit.

OoO

They had swapped again as soon as they had been assured that nobody – humans, angels or demons – was watching. Aziraphale was happy to regain his envelope, even if he was painfully aware of the marks on his skin. He had not felt them on Crowley’s body. However, the holy water had been good for his soul and he suffered less than usual. He would have to do it again. Or maybe to confection some holy water-balm.

Then Crowley had invited him, or rather tempted him, to the Ritz, which he had accepted with pleasure.

For the first time in six thousand years, Aziraphale felt free to do what he wanted, without fearing to be judged for each of his actions. He was free to dine with a demon. Free to be with him. Free to love him.

He couldn’t deny that he loved Crowley and was utterly attracted by him. He had been happy to take his appearance, to be so close to him just for once in his life. A shiver went through him as the thought of him stripping in Crowley’s envelope to take the bath. Crowley was truly perfect in every way.

“Hey, angel ?”

“Hm ?”

He stopped watching his dessert to look at Crowley who was drinking his coffee.

“What is going on, my dear ?”

“Let’s go walking ? I ate too much.”

Aziraphale fondly smiled.

“You barely ate Crowley. At best you nibbled.”

“You know I don’t eat. Only with you.”

His smile didn’t leave him as they walked out of the restaurant. Oh, Crowley was so adorable ! How someone could not love a being like him ? It wasn’t important that he was a demon. He felt lucky to have him by his side. He knew his love would never be returned. Never mind, as long as he could stay close to him.

“You seem well,” Crowley suddenly said. “I would have thought that this tour in Hell would have affected you more than that.”

“Are you disappointed ?” Aziraphale scoffed.

“Yes, a little, Mister Rubber Duck !”

They laughed wholeheartedly.

“You can say that the bath energized me.”

“I understand, the fire had the same effect on me. You should have seen the face of these idiots Archangels when they realized that you weren’t burning. Ah ! This was something. Gabriel seemed even more uptight than at the Tadfield Airbase.”

Aziraphale tried to hide his laugh but couldn’t stop giggling.

“What would you say to drink at the bookshop? I would like to see if your cellar has filled up since the Apocalypse.”

“Anything you want, dear boy.”

They changed their way and took the route to go back to Soho. By chance, the Ritz was installed near Soho, and therefore near the shop. Well, ‘by chance’, he might have accomplished a miracle or two at the time to have it built next to his shop. It wasn’t his fault ! He had been to the Ritz in Paris a couple of months after the opening, so when he heard that César Ritz wanted to install a restaurant in London, he had been forced to act.

It had earned him another mark, now that he thought about it. Michael had said that he was a brainless glutton who deserved to be punished for his sins. He frowned while remembering the pain he had felt when he had received the mark on his right flank. A very sensible place that had difficulties to properly cicatrize.

All that is to say that their walk to the shop didn’t last long, but during this moment of silence, after a few minutes, five actually, Aziraphale felt Crowley’s hand brush his. At this moment, he thought that it was because they were walking side by side on the narrow pavement, but they touched again, once, then twice and the third time one of Crowley long and thin finger hooked one of his, until his hand was holding his hand and their fingers intertwined.

Aziraphale kept walking but forgot to breathe after that. Oh, never he would have thought Crowley could have such sentiments for him. Because it was that, wasn’t it ? It couldn’t be anything else. He had been sure the demon didn’t like him this way.

He had never been intimate with another being, but he had read enough romance novels to know what was happening. The contact was so soft, he thought. Never did he imagine how one simple contact like this could generate so many emotions in himself. He could have kept holding Crowley’s hand forever.

Aziraphale had been blushing all the way until they got to the shop. He didn’t dare look at Crowley, who didn’t let go of his hand, to his utter delight, even if the demon didn’t say a word. His hold was sweet but firm, and he loved this.

They finally parted when they walked into the shop. Aziraphale went fetching some bottles in his wine cellar, which one was miraculously filled again. On the other hand, he wasn't certain of their quality. What could an eleven-year-old Antichrist know about wine after all ?

“So ? Good wine ?” Crowley asked. He was slumped on the sofa, his long legs spread out.

This view made Aziraphale smile as much as it made him swoon. Crowley didn’t know how to properly sit, he never did. He remembered the fourteenth century and all the conventions of the time (and the full suit of metal armour), while Crowley had a hard time standing right. It was also a view that he quite enjoyed, he thought while nibbling his lips. He was gorgeous.

“I can’t say, my dear,” he responded and he took two glasses to pour the wine. “But I suppose that there is only one way to know ?

“Indeed !”

Crowley grabbed his glass and took a sip.

“So ?” He asked without drinking.

“Not the best of your cellar, but it isn’t bad.”

Aziraphale smelled the wine, whirled it in his glass and smelled again then he took the first sip. Indeed, it wasn’t a great vintage but it slipped down easily.

OoO

Crowley had barely drunk. Much to his regret of course, because the wine really wasn’t that bad. He merely vanished it gradually with subtle miracles. Aziraphale took over to serve them continuously until he got drunk. They were used to drink together. It was something they did on a regular basis for some decades now.

Fortunately, the angel didn’t suspect a thing, and in the end, it was Crowley who was filling his glass with wine while listening to him babbling about nothing. Oh, he loved hearing him talk. Aziraphale’s voice was lovely. Everything in him was lovely.

His hands were lovely. His skin was soft and warm, he daydreamed while thinking with great pleasure that his angel had let him hold his hand. He hoped he would forgive him because he really wanted to move forward in their relationship now that they were free to live like they wanted, without having to rely on their former sides. But they couldn’t be together if one was hiding important facts.

“And then… He said that the otter… S… The… Hm… The one that is in the water. Ah yes, Sea otter! He said they are adorable creatures. And I said ‘No my good man, the otters are evil fur hats that deserve to finish in fur balls.’”

Crowley chuckled. Ah, he began to be incoherent. It was the moment to take action.

“Angel, don’t you think it’s hot around here ?

“Hmm… Yes, a little,” Aziraphale agreed.

“Yeah, same. I’m going to put myself more at ease.”

Crowley got up and slowly removed his jacket then his shirt to remain in the tank top of the jumpsuit he always wore under his clothes.

‘Come on, take off your clothes ! I have to know how far the damages extend to,’ he furiously thought. He had to refrain himself to move forward Aziraphale and to take off his shirt himself. But Aziraphale stayed completely still, his eyes wide and following his very movements. He saw his green eyes coming down his torso, and clearly lingering on the unveiled flesh of his arms, before coming up to his face. Crowley saw his cheeks, already red from the alcohol, redden further.

Until now, Crowley hadn’t been certain what Aziraphale felt toward him. For all he knew, Aziraphale could have been totally disinterested in a charnel relationship, but his gaze betrayed him. This idea affected him more than he would have thought and he almost hissed with want. He loved that his angel could desire him as much as he wanted him.

“You maybe need some help ?” Crowley offered while smiling before he got closer to him. “Let me take off your jacket.”

Aziraphale let him with a slight wariness in the eye. Ngk. He probably wasn’t drunk enough. Never mind, he couldn’t stop now. Crowley needed to know.

Crowley folded his jacket and placed it on the sofa’s armrest. The angel was still wearing his vest and his shirt.

“Crowley…?” Aziraphale seemed to falter. “What’you doin’... You…”

He shook his hand, unable to properly speak.

“Nothing angel, you might break into a sweat. You’ll be better without all these layers.”

The demon tried to undo his vest but Aziraphale didn’t let him this time and stood up suddenly. Or rather staggered. He couldn’t really stand up straight.

“No, I’m going to keet- keep the rest,” he stuttered and moved away from Crowley.

“Aw come on, angel !”

Aziraphale shook his head, and out of the corner of his eye, Crowley saw the bottles replenish themselves. Fuck. His plan was falling apart. Well, plan B !

“What are you trying to achieve, you wily serpent ?” Aziraphale scolded while pinching his nose bridge.

“I am aware of the marks,” he said out of the blue.

And then, he saw his angel break down and he thought for a second that he was on the verge of discorporating. Aziraphale collapsed on the couch, his face pale, as though all the blood from his body had left him, and his eyes wide open.

“Oh.”

“The Archangels brought it up when I was Upstairs.”

It was really manipulative of him. It wasn’t right. Aziraphale was going to be really angry once he understood. Well, he was already angry with Crowley. He might not even talk to him for years, maybe decades. The thought broke his heart but it was already too late.

“I… I…”

Aziraphale seemed so very ashamed and his gaze was fixed on the ground. Then, after a moment, he raised his head again and Crowley could see the fury deep in those green eyes.

“You got me drunk to see them ?!” He screamed, pissed like he never saw him before.

“I-,” Crowley tried to say.

“I thought you were my friend ! You wanted to trap me !”

Oh no. Oh no. Crowley could see the eyes of his friend, the person he loved most in the world (and all the worlds to be accurate), fill up with tears. Yes, he had wanted to know, but he hadn’t wanted him to be sad.

“No, I didn’t want to trap you ! I just wanted to… To…”

“You wanted to what ?! To see how I am a poor excuse of an angel ?! The marks of my disobedience and my incompetence ?!”

And with that, Crowley suddenly realized what had really happened. All its horror and cruelty hit him. Heaven was punishing the angels who didn’t do a good job. The Archangels had hurt his angel. This angel, who was the best one of all Heaven, had been punished only because they didn’t value him for what he really was.

Gabriel’s words came back to him. There is no place left on your body for another mark. For Sat- for Hea-... Argh, for someone’s sake ! How many times had his angel been punished ?! How many times did he have to suffer the Archangels' foolishness ?!

“… You didn’t know,” Aziraphale figured out when he saw his face darkened. “You fooled me…”

“Angel, I am so sorry,” he said hastily and he tried to take him in his arms. “I had to know. Gabriel really talked about the mark. Did they… Did they torture you ?”

OoO

Aziraphale didn’t answer right away. He didn’t want to. All he wanted was for Crowley to leave his shop, but he knew that he wouldn’t, not before he got a glance at these damned marks.

He was so angry against Crowley for wanting to trap him ! And he was also disappointed in himself. He should have known that the Archangels were going to talk about it. He should have anticipated Crowley’s curiosity.

Never had he felt so awful in all his life. Aziraphale wanted it to stay secret, his secret, and for Crowley to never find out.

“You want to see them, that’s right ?” He whispered. “Then watch.”

Aziraphale removed his jacket and top in precipitate and jerky movements, then he showed him his back. He refused to see the demon’s face as he barred the real him and revealed the extent of the damage. He heard a gasp. Crowley probably didn’t expect this, a body whose skin was covered by white scars, remnants of the marks carved in red hot iron.

“Are you satisfied ?” He asked with a quivering voice.

He didn’t respond. Aziraphale forced himself to breathe calmly to regain control of his heartbeat. He wanted to hide in a dark corner and cry.

“No, I am not,” Crowley whispered after getting closer to him.

The demon laid his hands on Aziraphale’ shaking shoulders, seemingly not knowing what to say. What could he possibly have to say ? The angel shrugged. It wasn’t like there were words to comfort someone in his position. It was his own fault he was punished, that’s all. He just wanted it to be a secret.

“How… With what did they do that ?”

“… Hellfire.”

He turned around and saw the yellow eyes of his friend on him.

“They didn’t have the right,” Crowley grunted, his eyes fixed on his scars. “You never did anything wrong…”

“And how can you be so certain of that ?” He sighed while he put his top to hide his back, too tired to yell at the demon.

“You are the best angel of Heaven ! How could they do that to you ?!”

Was Crowley angry for him ? Aziraphale certainly didn’t expect that. He expected pity, or maybe disgust.

“It’s… It doesn’t concern you, Crowley.”

“Of course it does !”

The demon took his hands in his and the angel saw his cheek, ordinarily so pale, turn red.

“You – Your. I. Ngk ! You matter to me !”

“Crowley…”

Crowley’s hands tightened around him in a warm and strangely comforting embrace.

“You could never harm anyone. You can be a bastard sometimes, but I’ve never seen you hurt anybody willingly. Hm. Except for this human who had his head cut, but honestly he was looking for trouble.”

“I have been punished for his death,” Aziraphale said, head down.

“Wha – But he wanted to discorporate you !”

“I know. But I left London without authorization just to eat…”

Crowley began to hiss in a threatening way, silently cursing the Archangels for the wrong they did to Aziraphale.

“You are the most worthy being in this universe,” he whispered while taking the angel against himself in a warm embrace. “They never should have hurt you.” 

OoO

Crowley had insisted on Aziraphale to tell him absolutely everything. From the first sanction to the last one, which had taken place only some years ago. It had took them all night. Sometimes, Aziraphale had stopped to pull himself together. The memory of the pain of each mark was too strong. During all the time the angel talked, Crowley had held his hand, stroking it like he was made of porcelain, to comfort him.

Aziraphale had stopped talking for several long moments and he had finally relaxed.

“How many of you had been this marked ?”

“Oh, very few,” Aziraphale admitted, ashamed. “Especially the angels working on Earth, like me. It’s easy to succumb… To the temptation.”

The angel’s gaze passed on the demon face – on his lips – then lower to the ground.

“I am tempting you, angel ?”

“Oh, Crowley. You. Ah… My dear, you should know what you do to me.”

This conversation was getting more and more interesting.

“No, I don’t know what I am doing to you.”

Their fingers entwined again. With his other hand, Crowley raised Aziraphale’s chin to look him in his still shiny eyes.

“Most of your marks… They are my fault,” he breathed. “You were hurt because of me.”

“No ! Oh no, please don’t think that. It was because of this that I didn’t want to talk to you about it. It was… my fault. If I had been a better angel, I never would have been marked. I would have acted otherly, I would have been more discrete…”

Crowley silenced him by putting a finger on his lips and immediately Aziraphale ceased to talk.

“It wasn’t your fault. You never wanted that.”

Aziraphale nodded but Crowley felt that he didn’t believe him entirely. It would take years before Aziraphale stopped to believe it was his fault. They would need a lot more conversations in the future, even for Crowley, who was still processing all he learnt tonight. He would have a lot more questions and he would have to handle his murderous pulsions. The demon would restrain himself just so his angel would not have to add this to his problems.

And he would have to learn how to handle his own culpability. He had been so often the cause of Aziraphale’s troubles and pain.

“Thank you for listening,” Aziraphale said. “I have to say that… It’s good not to have to keep this all for myself.”

“I’m always here if you need an ear, angel, you know that.”

Aziraphale smiled, a smile that Crowley loved. Embarrassed but so genuine. He smiled similarly when Crowley cleared his coat. Crowley couldn’t hold back anymore. He put his hand on Aziraphale’s neck, taking the time to appreciate the soft blond curls at his nape. Then he leant to kiss him.

The angel suddenly breathed and closed his eyes, but Crowley stopped just before their lips could touch.

“Crowley,” Aziraphale whined.

“I’m sorry, I have to ask. I don’t want to go too fast for you. May I – Hmph !”

Aziraphale was the one who reduced the space to kiss him. Once the surprise over, Crowley got to devour the angel lips, then his neck and finally all the skin he could reach with his starving mouth.

He was stopped however when he tried to take off his top.

“Not… Not there Crowley,” he whispered.

“Okay, not there.”

Yes, it would take time for Aziraphale to accept his body like he was, with all these marks, without seeing them as imperfection. In Crowley’s eyes though, he was perfect.

“I love you,” Aziraphale told him in a breath, incertain.

Crowley enfolded him in arms in another warm embrace and whispered to his ear :

“I love you, my angel.”

OoO

Crowley had put Aziraphale to bed. The angel was exhausted, a kind of mental tiredness. To relive all these memories didn’t do well on him and, as he suspected, his short trip in Hell had wearied him. Crowley might have done a little demonic miracle to soothe his sleep. And he didn’t need to hear what was going to happen.

He kissed his angel on his forehead, then he went down the stairs to reach the street. He had smelt them. Such holy smell didn’t go unnoticed to a demon. Uriel and Sandalphon stood in front of the bookshop, in front of him, with a superior air on their infuriating faces.

“Demon Crowley,” Sandalphon began. We don’t know how you do, but –”

Crowley snapped his fingers and a blaze arose in the street, swallowing Sandalphon who couldn’t do anything but scream in suffering. Uriel took a few steps back, horrified, and put a hand before her mouth to keep herself from screaming.

Crowley quietly went down the steps, like the predator he was in reality. His yellow eyes were reduced to two slits fixed on her. A mad smile was his face.

“Uriel,” he greeted in a ridiculous and exaggerated bow.

“What did you – By the Lord !”

“Oh, shut up you damned angel !” Crowley growled while he formed a hellfire ball in his hand.

Uriel took another step back and she looked at what had been Sandalphon. Not much left. The demon didn’t even approach them, only looked… How did he do this ?! He was no one, only a second zone demon !

“I know for the marks you inflicted on the other angels. I know you hurt Aziraphale. And I know this pile of ashes was responsible for a lot of his sufferings. I want you to deliver a message to Heaven, Uriel.”

The angel nodded, her eyes wet with tears, terrified by the demon before her, and following his burning hand with her eyes.

“I want you to tell them to let Aziraphale alone. Should you touch him again, even one of his hair, I can assssssure you that the war you plan to have with Hell would be nothing, _nothing_ , compared to what I’ll do to you. I’ll come for you, for you all.”

Uriel stood motionless before him.

“Am I clear ?” He aggressively hissed.

“Yes, quite clear,” she said quickly before leaving in a ray of light.

Crowley clapped his hands together and rubbed them together, satisfied with his work. He looked for the ashes on the ground. This was a good way to end a day. And with this, Hell would eventually forgive him, at least partially, which would assure his protection and his angel’s. It was perfect.

Now, he had to go back near Aziraphale and watch over him.

End


End file.
